100 great movie lines

My interview with Marc Shelkin of Twist or Stick

Mindplay - mind controlled scalextric

Mind-controlled Scalextric from B-Reel & B-Reel Films on Vimeo.

In a a galaxy far far away...

...I imagine a dole queue (probably next door to that bar in Mos Eisley)... a dole queue that is largely populated by the entire cast of Star Wars...

R2D2 and C3PO are there, their shiny metallic bodies a bit rusty, C3PO with a bit of a flabby overhang round the middle. I wonder what the android name for a beer belly is? R2D2, cigarette hanging out of an unused disk drive. Mistily looking back on better times, falling down the celebrity rankings... Dark times have beset our heroes.

Enter C3PO and R2D2: Good day sir, are there any new opportunities for us today?

Job centre official: "Well there's a job representing Curry's, a white goods store on planet Earth. They're looking for a double act at the moment, any good?"

C3PO: Oh, not to be impolite sir, but that does sound... well pretty bad doesn't it? "

R2D2: beep, woop, beeeeeep, burrrrrp

Job centre official: Yeah well, whaddyagonna do, heh, you ain't exactly in demand at the moment?!

C3PO and R2D2: Ok, ok... we'll try out for the audition"

Job centre official: "Next!"

In waddles Yoda, even by his own standards he looks haggard (rumours of a pescription drug problem have been circulating)

Yoda: Auditions, you have?

Agent: Well, it's a tough market out there at the moment, what with the recession... let me see.. oh yes some phone company on Earth wants some old school religious nut to help create awareness around the new function of a phone?

Yoda: Hummmm, come to this it has. Accept I must.

So what is it with all the ads using Star Wars characters?

When the Curry's ads came out, I thought damn that's pretty cool, what a coup for them, Curry's is dump of a store, with terrible customer service, well the one nearest me in Brixton is. (For those who remember, during the recent London riots a girl was arrested outside Curry's carrying a boxed microwave. To make matters worse she was still wearing her Curry's uniform)... anyway the ads were beautifully shot, particularly the cross tracks and they really brought together two entities seemingly galaxies apart (tee hee).

And then along came the VW ad with the little boy dressed in his Darth Vader outfit and his Dad gives him a helping hand with the force. Cute and charming (although a bit twee for my liking), but at least it was clever and didn't feature the actual Darth Vader.

And next thing you know Yoda starts making an appearance for Vodafone talking about how long it takes to port your number across form one handset to another... again beautifully shot but hardly warrants use of the force, and ultimately a dull message.

And then the worst of the lot - VW have brought out an ad to follow the first one with a load of dogs and we end up in the bar of Moss Eisly. What a shameless bolt on!

I can only assume that the global recession has spread further than our humble planet, maybe it should be renamed the 'galactic recession'

So, not wishing to piss off any creative folk here, the scripts are witty and charming and the art direction beautifully shot but where has our creativity gone? Where has the desire for originality gone? Once Curry's had done their ads surely there has to be a cooling off period before you can start using the Star Wars characters again? But no, it seems everyone wants in on the action, and sadly George Lucas only seems too happy to oblige.